Emotional Intelligence: When Business Becomes Personal

"The work/life balance" is often spoken about as a good thing in business, indicating a success at managing one's personal life in perfect tandem with a career. However, it can also cause problems in the workplace. When negative elements of work or your home life clash, the consequences can be dire.

If you have a stressful home life or event such as a divorce or an unhappy atmosphere, it can be hard not to bring this stress to the workplace, too. After all, many of us make friends for life at work and they can be a support and shoulder to cry on. However, if it's getting to be too big a burden for either you or those whose shoulders you seek, it may be time to look to another source of counsel for your issues.

A stressful or unhappy home life can also have a direct knock-on effect with sick days due to stress, or time off to support other family members, or extended holidays to deal with problems. This can all affect your career negatively.

If it's not your fault, but your responsibility (such as being a carer for an elderly parent at home), then a word with your boss or manager may help you to reach a mutually satisfactory decision on how to create a better work/life balance for you.

It can also work the other way around - having a demanding job or one where you are absent a lot can affect your home life negatively. If you find yourself snappy, disgruntled and stressed when you step in the door, or you find that your job takes you too far away from your family for too long, you may want to reassess your career and choices. Whether it's asking for a placement nearer home, or changing your role all together, your happiness and health are more important than a salary.

Sometimes, personal relationships can get in the way of normal work procedure. If you're always hiring your friends and people you like for a project or team, rather than those properly qualified, then you're discriminating without knowing it (a phenomenon nicknamed 'jobs for the boys').

If your colleagues are also your friends, then they will understand you trying to be objective at work and shouldn't hold it against you for picking other people from time to time. Another obvious no-no when it comes to the personal interfering in business is relationships. It's even harder to treat a partner as 'just a colleague' at work, but do this you must, or you may be accused of favouritism at work.

The worst kind of business/personal mix is the office affair - needless to say, it's probably an extremely unwise scenario to find yourself in, and could jeopardise your career entirely.

Overall, sometimes it's hard to let your emotional intelligence separate the business and personal, whether it's the stress you carry in your head or the way you relate to people, but acknowledging it is half the battle. Self-awareness is the key, and you may even want to book a course that may help you deal with these elements better in the future.