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How to Improve your Listening Skills to be a better Leader

Read any book or article about the necessary talents to be a great Leader, and effective communication skills are dominate, particularly the ability to be a great listener. Mastering listening is one of the five key essentials in communication that every Manager needs.

To get you started, follow these 5 practical tips:

1) Use open questions, not just closed

When you want to uncover your customers needs, improve your negotiation techniques, or understand why there is conflict, use open questions. They are key in understanding the other persons position.

Some people get into the habit of asking closed questions or searching for quick ‘yes’ or ‘no’ responses. They make assumptions to try and save time. Open questions are powerful initiators to the art of listening and begin with who, where, what, how and why?

2) Adapt your listening style to the other person’s culture.

 When working with international clients and colleagues, it’s important to adapt your listening style. I worked in Asia for 10 years and found that professionals in China are extremely respectful. They listen intensely to others, especially their Leaders. They acknowledge what is being said ‘carefully’ and with quiet empathy. Be aware of who you are speaking to, because their culture should influence your listening style.

3) Practise listening without interrupting

You may have heard about active listening, it is an important technique to master and uses the powers of the senses. Being able to listen without interrupting is a powerful skill. One of the world’s leading sound experts, Julian Treasure said in his viral TED talk – 5 ways to listen better “we are losing our listening.“

5 ways to listen better | Julian Treasure | TED

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Next time you engage with colleagues, clients or family, listen with intent. You may discover more than you might imagine and build an even stronger relationship.

4) Don’t think about what you will say while the other person is speaking.

In this interesting article in the Huffington Post there is a unique definition of effective listening:

“Listening involves letting the person finish their sentence completely and orientating your response around them, not yourself.”

Listen without thinking about a response or question, therefore avoiding the distractions of how you are going to reply. This will help you to see non-verbal cues and identify those things that are not being said.

5) Actively listen for what’s under the surface

Look for cues in tone and body language and actively seek what’s not being said but being suggested. This can be led by the emphasis on how the person presents the conversation, their conviction and their attitude.

Take the next step

If you are a new or an experienced Manager, there is no doubt that effective listening skills are essential. They optimise productivity, efficiency and performance. With so much at stake, I encourage you to make a start as soon as possible. Find out more with our Effective Communication Training Course.

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Boost productivity and reduce stress with ‘coping networks’

Coping with stress

Stress defined? ‘When the demands placed upon us at work exceed our resources, and we feel we can no longer cope’. You’ve had a stressful day – there’s too much work, deadlines are tight and you’re worrying constantly about the consequences of not getting it done. Perhaps your manager (also stressed) is shouting at you? It’s the end of another working day and you feel exhausted, irritable and on edge. What is going on?

Stress management in the workplace training London

If you are stressed, you spend your day in a state of constant anxiety. Basically, you’re stuck in fight or flight mode, that powerful survival instinct designed to assist us whenever we feel threatened or in danger. You perceive a threat, fight or flight is switched on, and adrenaline and cortisol is released into your bloodstream. There are physical effects such as increased heart rate, raised body temperature, sweaty palms and butterflies in your stomach).

However, the main problem is the amount of nervous energy it gives you, which is designed to keep you alive, to fight back or take flight! But you’re in the office, not about to engage a sabre-toothed tiger in mortal combat!

Once you have dealt with the threat, the fight or flight mechanism is supposed to switch off. It’s only meant to be used in temporary, short-term bursts. The problem is that stressed out people see threats around them all the time, so they go into fight or flight mode and get stuck there. The nervous energy within them builds up throughout the day, and at some point it will have to be released!

What can you do?

Let’s talk about coping networks; finding an appropriate outlet for the pent up nervous energy, emotion and frustration generated during a stressful working day. These networks are very important, because if we can’t find a suitable way of releasing our nervous energy, it will come out in other ways. This could be an outburst – we’ve had a hard day, and someone says something we don’t like. Before we know it, we’re raging at this unfortunate victim!

Here are some popular coping networks:

  • Exercise – ever wondered why people go to the gym after work, or go running? Obviously a healthy pastime, but also an effective way to burn off the nervous energy accumulated at work. Any form of sporting endeavour can be useful here.
  • Talking things through with family, friends and colleagues. Perhaps after you’ve played sport, it’s time for a drink in the bar? Over a nice glass of something, the conversation usually starts with ‘you will not believe the day I’ve had…’
  • Hobbies and pastimes – any activity which allows you to relax for a while.

Corporate stress management courses london

There are no hard and fast rules here – it’s each to their own. Some people like to take the dog for a walk in the countryside, learn to play an instrument, or take a hot bath with essential oils and candles.

Conclusion

During a stressful day at work, nervous energy accumulates within us. That energy is going to find a way out at some point, and it’s better for everyone if we can control how and when that happens. As discussed, there are a number of possibilities available so find the way that works for you. Thinking about your day and any stress points, what’s worked well for you in the past? And what could you do today to create some essential ‘me’ time?