{"id":6024,"date":"2022-09-08T14:26:53","date_gmt":"2022-09-08T14:26:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.stl-training.co.uk\/b\/?p=6024"},"modified":"2023-12-31T01:05:50","modified_gmt":"2023-12-31T01:05:50","slug":"effective-communication-listening-skills","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.stl-training.co.uk\/b\/effective-communication-listening-skills\/","title":{"rendered":"Effective communication \u2013 Listening skills"},"content":{"rendered":"

One aspect of being an effective communicator<\/a> is having the ability and skills to listen really well. Many of life\u2019s problems arise from poor communication.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

When you choose to improve the quality of your communication skills, you will start to see the results you want, whether that\u2019s to be more productive, efficient, or even profitable. A big step is to learn to listen effectively. Research<\/a> suggests we spend between 70- 80% of our day engaged in some form of communication. Of that, about 55% of our time is devoted to listening. Most people usually only remember about 17 to 25% of the things they listen to.<\/p>\n

Levels of listening<\/strong><\/h2>\n

There are many descriptors for levels that we listen at, here are some:<\/p>\n

    \n
  • Passive listening<\/strong> \u2013 this is when we are distracted by other things we hear in the background, ignoring what the other is saying<\/li>\n
  • Pretend listening<\/strong> – also called \u2018responsive listening’, using stock nods and smiles and \u201cof course,\u201d but not really listening<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

    \"\"<\/p>\n

      \n
    • Biased\/projective listening<\/strong> \u2013 This is ‘selective listening’ hearing only what you want to and dismissing the other person’s views<\/li>\n
    • Misunderstood listening<\/strong> \u2013 When we unconsciously overlay our own interpretations and make things fit when they don\u2019t<\/li>\n
    • Attentive listening<\/strong> \u2013 This is fact gathering and analysis, sometimes with manipulation of the other person, sometimes with a hidden agenda<\/li>\n
    • Empathic listening<\/strong> \u2013 When we understand feelings, gather facts, and ask lots of open questions<\/li>\n
    • Active listening<\/strong> \u2013 This is fully understanding and checking facts and feelings, being truly present and engaged when someone is talking to you, so that you can actively hear what is being said in the conversation. A great active listener hears not only the words that are being said but the underlying story behind the words.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

      \"\"<\/p>\n

      Common mistakes to avoid<\/strong><\/h2>\n

      Unfortunately to listen completely and with undivided attention is extremely tiring and almost impossible to do at all times, It’s very natural for our minds to wander and to get distracted by our own thoughts and feelings, so we are all guilty of slipping into some poor habits such as:<\/p>\n

        \n
      • Interrupting the other person <\/strong>\u2013 is there anything more annoying?<\/li>\n
      • Preparing what you want to say while they speak <\/strong>\u2013 Sometimes known as combative listening<\/li>\n
      • Not fully paying attention or concentrating <\/strong>\u2013 Especially when we are tired or emotional.<\/li>\n
      • Checking your phone <\/strong>\u2013 Just plain rude!<\/li>\n
      • Assuming you know what the person wants without double checking <\/strong>\u2013 You really won\u2019t!<\/li>\n
      • Stereotyping individuals by their accent or style of speaking <\/strong>– Are you guilty of biases?<\/li>\n
      • Being defensive <\/strong>\u2013 Stop! Wait your turn before speaking and hear the other person out!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n

        \"\"<\/p>\n

        Active listening<\/strong><\/h2>\n

        To actively listen you have to tune into multiple factors: Facial expressions and body language, as well as the actual words you hear so that you can decipher someone\u2019s true message and then, effectively process it. One great way to remember this is in the acronym ACTIVE:<\/p>\n

        \"\"<\/p>\n

        Conclusion<\/strong><\/h2>\n

        One of the most powerful things you can do for another is to employ active listening, it can make another human feel cared for and connected. When we are really listened to it makes us feel validated, affirmed, valued and more importantly, understood.<\/p>\n

        As Stephen Covey famously said: \u201cMost people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

        One aspect of being an effective communicator is having the ability and skills to listen really well. Many of life\u2019s problems arise from poor communication. When you choose to improve the quality of your communication skills, you will start to see the results you want, whether that\u2019s to be more productive, efficient, or even profitable. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[633],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6024","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-professional-development"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.stl-training.co.uk\/b\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6024","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.stl-training.co.uk\/b\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.stl-training.co.uk\/b\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stl-training.co.uk\/b\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stl-training.co.uk\/b\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6024"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.stl-training.co.uk\/b\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6024\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6040,"href":"https:\/\/www.stl-training.co.uk\/b\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6024\/revisions\/6040"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.stl-training.co.uk\/b\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6024"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stl-training.co.uk\/b\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6024"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stl-training.co.uk\/b\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6024"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}